Always a mailorder bridesmaid, never the mailorder bride © PETER ANDERSSON A MUSIC PARODY BASED ON: "THE FUTURE'S SO BRIGHT, I GOTTA WEAR SHADES" BY: TIMBUK 3 BONUS QUOTE: "I belong to Bridegrooms Anonymous. Whenever I feel like getting married, they send over a lady in a housecoat and hair curlers to burn my toast for me." DICK MARTIN		I first came up with the title as a line for another parody, in the end it didn't fit the theme of that one, I'm not sure any original song fully does, certainly syllable count to the title of this one doesn't, though the rest comes pretty close, so says all my Filipino and Belarusian "friends". She's like a home appliance, a household asset She's got a lotta features and washes glasses But she's running late, and she's only gettin' later She's never the bride, always the maid With mailorder brides, she's always the maid The mail-order maid She's into housewarming as her occupation Fifty jobs a year, she's tipped a lot of beer When she's moving on, she's not even gettin' moved on She's never the bride, always the maid No mailorder bride, but always the maid The mail-order maid She's not chestily blessed, still cherry pie She's an effing old hag, can't land a guy Times is running out, and she's into getting' blackouts She's never the bride, always the maid With mailorder brides, she's always the maid The mail-order maid She has a stamped compliance, she's serving lasses They all got hotter bodies and firmer asses She can not hook up, even with a master baiter She's never the bride, always the maid No mailorder bride, but always the maid The mail-order maid A postal bridesmaid A mail-order maid © Peter Andersson 2010
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