He's too chewy
© PETER ANDERSSON

A MUSIC PARODY
BASED ON:
"I'M TOO SEXY"
BY: RIGHT SAID FRED



BONUS QUOTE:
"Two days before the first game The England Team visited an orphanage in Rio. 'It's heartbreaking to see their sad little faces with no hope', said Jose, age 6.
UNKNOWN
 
Luis Suárez, an Uruguayan striker slash player in the ongoing Soccer World Cup, has been banned for being a serial biter, apparently he likes to sink his teeth into opponent team players while in the goal zone, only this time, thanks to worldwide broadcast, an audience in the billions saw him do it.

He's too chewy for the cup
Too chewy for the cup
Cup's going to ban him

He's soo chewy that it hurts
Soo chewy that it hurts
He'll chomp through your shirt

And he's too chewy for the fans
Too chewy for the fans
World Cup wants him banned

And he's soo chewy that it's quirky
Soo chewy that it's quirky
No way his team's advancing

He plays soccer, his teething is mean
And he takes a little bite in the goal zone
Yeah in the goal zone, in the goal zone, yeah
As many joints have learned in the goal zone

He's too chewy for a star
Too chewy for a star
It's seen from afar

And he's more chewy than a rat
More chewy than a rat
Why'd his team connive that

He's a sucker, with vampire grin
As he grabs out for a grub in the goal zone
Yeah in the goal zone, in the goal zone, yeah
So look for foots-in-mouth in the goal zone

Too chewy for the...
Too chewy for the...
Too chewy for the...

He plays soccer, so muzzle that bitch
If he draws another blood in the goal zone
Yeah in the goal zone, in the goal zone, yeah
His bite's worse than his bark in the goal zone

He's too chewy for the cup
His chewing's gotta stop
Darn chewy - darn chewy pup

He's too chewy for the game
Soo chewy it's a shame
Cup's aiming to ban him

And he's too chewy for the win



© Peter Andersson 2014

   

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