15 girls to taste
for Hitler



"There are no rules here, we're trying to accomplish something."
Occasionally a parody of mine starts with a really wacky title sub rather than a general theme, and those are often the hardest ones to give up on, especially if they turn out kinda spicy and/or tasteless, like this one. Also, I'm the first to admit that the pacing kinda sucks on the namedropping parts here (but I've tried to make up for that on the rest). For starters the original has one syllable names, but apparently German parents don't name their girls that way so I've had to go with mostly one extra all the way. Also I totally had to give up on finding German named food with good rhyming quality to such names. In the spirit of artistic license I'm therefore letting Hitler chow down on tortilla and smoke ganja (but do we really know for sure that he didn't?). As for the context it's about Margot Woelk who at age 95 came out as the last survivor among a group of 15 young women that were forced to work as food tasters for Hitler during WW2 so that he wouldn't be poisoned and killed that way by the Allies.

The problem's his jagerwurst and all the revelry
With sauerkraut coming it was poisonous to me
We had to help him suck it down - we were draftees
We were the 15 girls to taste for Hitler

He served us kosher borscht and lagers, what a dude
But the catch - a risk of cyanide or strychnine in the food
We had to risk ourselves - for that lebensraum dumb feud
We were the 15 girls to taste for Hitler

15 girls to taste for Hitler

So just check out the milk, Silke
Stout should be cold, Isolde
Don't serve him no beans, Jasmine
He doesn't agree

Bring out the trout, Traute
He don't like salmone, Simone
'Less it's with pasta, Asta
With Mussolini

So how's the cajun, Sigrun
What's with the cole, Nicole
You check out his wurst, and Kirsten
Just take it in wee

Give him some pie, Kai
But not the whole deli, Geli
Don't spice it with chili, Lili
'Less from Germany

He said you girls this plum job's really not the end
That there's this Waffle-SS - to which we could transcend
We had a turnover chat
And negotiated for all the 15 girls

We said we're down to brans and cream is out of sight
And his retort - that the Ruskies took his Holsteins over night
And they were coming - with a slice and dice and menu overwrite
We were just 15 girls to waste for Hitler

15 girls to taste for Hitler

So just smell out the cheese, Liese
Beer should be fizzy, Resi
If choke on sardines, Sabine
The coffin is free

Bring out the wines, Ines
He don't like tequila, Mila
'Less with a Havana, Jana
And Steffi's coffee

And then he smokes ganja, Tanja
He likes his tortilla, Kamilla
You need to spread butter, Jutta
On everything, gee

Give him bonbons, Yvonne
But no more of cabbage, Gabi
Enough with the cheddar, Hedda
Or gas will get thee

© Peter Andersson 2013