Diluvian kinky bonk tar defenestration


"The biblical account of Noah's Ark and the Flood is perhaps the most implausible story for fundamentalists to defend. Where, for example, while loading his ark, did Noah find penguins and polar bears in Palestine?"
If you want to you can exercise your free will and skip this intro, it isn't necessary for the song, it's just a recollection of how such a weird title came to be. In the beginning there was nothing but "kinky bonk women" to a well known tune from Rolling Stones. After that loose idea it quickly transferred to this OS and degenerated to "(Something) German kinky bonk scar association". Scar was expelled and replaced with tar when I learned that the latter is slang for sailor. At about the same time diluvian came to replace the prefix-free Germans. Then I fell under the weather and the whole theme drifted away from me for a while. Later, when I started over and a flood of lines begun to pair up, I saw that it was good but that the last word needed to be implying some kind of severe punishment. It struck me that even Noah's Ark must have had some kind of windows on its higher levels, from which sinners and crooks could be thrown to the sharks and crocs, and there, albeit with verses and my lifeguard muse still treading the open waters of uncompleted creation, I had at least finally disembarked "diluvian kinky bonk tar defenestration".

If your love life depends on
Old Noah and the flock
If your congregation offers
Nothing more than a breeding stock
If your wife's to pout her lips out
And you go to the stalls in desperation
Then you're facing
A cracked yak diluvian kinky bonk tar defenestration

When shaggy rams turns up their sockets
And such flings you're behind
If when scholars doze you're with your hose
Swinging on the ice bear line
Hell - rejoice but make no noise
You will be spurned and held for flood causation
Then - Deportation
It calls for diluvian kinky bonk tar defenestration

They're heaven sent so
manx cats, wolf packs, razorbacks, donkey jacks
and oxen are not to be ploughed
In part 'cos they're moo-saic
And such love is not allowed
You'll get no formal investigation
You'll get no penile croc jaw castration
Just a diluvian kinky bonk tar defenestration

If you're the scum, too readily,
in Pax Vobiscum, you'll go down
If you reach for cub, scout
for land, or you're gonna drown
If to you parrot chatter is Viagra from a beak then on boar-d
Depravation's - No medication
It calls for diluvian kinky bonk tar defenestration

They're heaven sent so
don't snog bullfrogs, wild hogs, dirty dogs
or siskins and tell it out loud
In part 'cos they're ark-haic
And such love attracts more clouds
There'll be no Red Sea Mose Law salvation
You'll get no last rite oil lubrication
Just a diluvian kinky bonk tar defenestration

A just cause diluvian kinky bonk tar defenestration

If lambs you lay - begone today!
A roll in the hay's - not done that way!

© Peter Andersson 2009