He only comes once a year © PETER ANDERSSON A MUSIC PARODY BASED ON: "ANOTHER ONE BITES THE DUST" BY: QUEEN BONUS QUOTE: "Christmas is a race to see which gives out first, your money or your feet." SHIRLEY TEMPLE		Here's one from my big sack of previously unfinished ideas, this one being that there must be at least one well known song where the chorus could be replaced by the old Christmas phrase "he only comes once a year". It might be a bit early to post it now in November with still a whole month to go, but let's just think of that as premature release... Nick comes merrily down the pipe with his sack filled and a ho Makes no sound but he's not petite, a snack down, ready to go Gone already? I was waiting for this! I've been staking out the socks for a week! Up through the chimney the bastard skips and ease on down the street He only comes once a year He only comes once a year And his sack is so big And his sack is so big He only comes once a year Hey, say will he come for you? Say, have you been nice this year? How does he do it when he jumps aplomb to the roof and then he's gone? I've waited for days and had no sleep then I missed him on the throne I'm not happy! Still feel crap inside! Cos again he has had me beat Up on the roof ridge his Rudolph trips an' flies down the street He only comes once a year He only comes once a year And his sack is so big And his sack is so big He only comes once a year Hey, I missed that Rudolph too I only blinked once I fear Ho... Oh, bite me! I am crushed Biting dust, yeah Ho He only comes once a year He only comes once a year, ho He only comes once a year, ho-ho He only comes once a year, heeeeeeey Ho... Shut up! There are tears in my eyes an' I curse the man but he has to leave my town My obsessin' is progressin', I'm transgressin' mad, but he cannot stick around I'll be ready, I'll be ready anew, I'm demanding a pre-warning tweet And on his next year's December trip I'll rig a trap door under his feet He only comes once a year He only comes once a year And his sack is so big And his sack is so big He only comes once a year Red, I'll make your Christmas blue And then I'll eat up the deers Shoot 'em Ho, I might © Peter Andersson 2011
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