I help myself to
loving ewes

© PETER ANDERSSON

A MUSIC PARODY
BASED ON:
"I HATE MYSELF FOR
LOVING YOU"
BY: JOAN JETT AND THE BLACKHEARTS



BONUS QUOTE:
"What if there were no hypothetical situations?"
UNKNOWN
 
Yeah, you're right, I know, I know, this type of parody where the writer and his muse is going for sheep laughs has been done many times over, and over, and over, and over (Editorial Break: We get it, move on). Our only defence here is that the title sub has never been done before and that it was irresistible to take on for such baaaaaadasses as the two of us.

Midnight, there's no light, where's the ewes?
It's time to get me some, at least one or two
I know I'm pervy when I shag what you stew
Pitch black, can't hang back, the farmer's in town
I get on back 'less it's on Mary's lamb
And overzealous just from wool white or brown

I'm on the prowl every single day
I come at night with a batch of DNA

I help myself to loving ewes
Shagging spree in the barns' what I do
I want a flock but a one sheep will do
That way I help myself to loving ewes

They can't fence my lance from their ewes
Cos I've been spearing through the barnyards, it's true
I keep getting horny from their smell and the taboo
No rams and no lambs smooth me right
And that old cloned one Dolly's best outta sight
You oughta see my facebook, my felletes are wolly white

My balls get blue by the sight of hay
I come apart and I'll ram a pride a day

I'll hurt myself to get to ewes
Shepherd dogs and morass I'll plow through
Once stuck on barb wire, dick's now askew
That time I held my breath 'til I got blue

(BAAAAAA GOES THE FLOCK - OVER A BANJO SOLO)

I roam the barns 'til the night turns day
I have my way in a fucking sheepish way

I'll lie my way to loving ewes
Foot-and-mouth disease signs' my best coup
That closed a road and a farm, even two
And I could help myself to loving ewes

I help myself to loving ewes
Snook my wife and she don't have a clue
I cannot stop and this song's ballyhoo
No way I'm gonna stop to love the ewes

I help myself… to loving ewes
Can't stop myself… from shagging ewes
I help myself… to loving ewes
Can't stop myself… from shagging ewes
I help myself to loving ewes



© Peter Andersson 2010

   

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