Sees all (does that nosy Northpoler) © PETER ANDERSSON A MUSIC PARODY BASED ON: "KEELHAULED" BY: ALESTORM BONUS QUOTE: "If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?" UNKNOWN		What if Santa Claus was real, reactive to naughty all year round and had an omnipresent surveillance operation going that was really, really intrusive? (Fans of Terry Pratchett and/or Douglas Adams might be interrested in knowing that inspiration for this parody about omnipresent surveillance in much (but loosely) came to my muse right after I'd read the book "The management style of the supreme beings" by Tom Holt). An elf oft walks behind you To see if you're a liar There'll be a docked point on the list For inconsistenc' with said prior He knows if you been naughty It's hard to loosen up for fun His omnipresence's out of hand Surveillance has us overrun The sky old Santa's filled with drones He's gone way overboard Swag is frowned on, don't you trip A walk outside's a brinkmanship Sees all, does that nosy Northpoler And he frowns at you to and fro Father Christmas runs the Earth Every bath that you take there's a periscope Sees all, does that nosy Northpoler Burn your porn mags and movies too Old Saint Nick he runs the Earth And you better not go for a Ho-Ho-Ho He's sitting close on everyone He says you're to behave - OR ELSE! He'll snap if you don't wash your hands His paparazzi's straight from Hell A dark beat lives in Santa's chest No safety zone inside his scroll Lost his red pen, gained a bat He will use it, and might whip you too Your diet's checked with endoscope And cookies you must hoard He's taken over WikiLeaks And microchipped your fingertips Knows all, he's a knowsy Knowthpoler And he's spellchecking in your hood Padre No Mas rules the Earth Every typo you make there'll be knuckle-blood Knows all, does that nosy Northpoler Who you've unfriended he will know Father Christmas runs the Earth And he doesn't like LOLcatz, No-No-No! The daily grind's a slipp'ry slope You have to file report Bragging's frowned on, don't you slip As naughty too's self-censorship Sees all, does that grumpy Northpoler And he looks down on me and you Father Christmas has us flanked He's reversed the old Hubble telescope Sees all, does that grumpy Northpoler Burn less gas and more midnight oil Down your chimney he'll have you spanked So you better go learn to tip-tip-toe © Peter Andersson 2017
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